Moving on.

Man today is just going by so show. I think it's the weather out here or something? That's funny I just asked myself my own question lol. Well I'm still hoping for these jobs to hire me so I can just move on already. Well lately I've been feeling a bit lonely. I really don't know why cause I have my family here with my friends. I guess it's not just that at all. I feel a bigger part missing, like a puzzle or something. There is this emptiness I can't figure out. I feel great around people all.... but for some weird reason. I think I might have to figure that out later I guess. So back to working out. Lately I've been doing some sit ups and man does it hurt now. I like doing sit ups sp much. I can't wait to do more workouts. Helps me forgot must of the things it is going on outside. Lately I've been thinking of a lot of poems. I don't know why but it makes me feel relaxed. The book stores always made me so relaxed. I never done this before but the self help section of the store where the books are at. Some what these books help a little build up your future and how to set your goals. They all sound good and hope to finish all of them. I also gone out and started finding things for my son and at the store Lowe's there was these toys and you can build them and they're so cute. They are made from wood and you use a hammer and other tools to make them. It's really neat lol. One day I would really like to build a toy for my son from scratch. I need to buy the tools doh. I like to see if I can make him so cute animals. I love my son and miss him so much. I hope one day I can hold him in my arms again. *Sign*... He is the only reason why I'm moving along. My heart will always be with him, even if I'm not I will watch him from above.

Good o day.

Wow I've been in and out of places. Jobs are all now starting to call me which is a great thing cause now I can soon here help surrport my son. This helps me alot move on with my life. Also today I got a chance to see him on the internet threw a web cam. Best day of my life ever. Seeing my little boy. I miss him. So I've been working out here and there. The last time I weighted myself was about a week ago. I went from 198lbs to 183lbs. Thats pretty good and I'm going to lose more here soon. My goal is to lose at lease 35lbs more from my goal. I want to be fit for my son and so he can have someone to look up to. He is my life. Also to look for a relationship with someone in the future. But before all that I'm going to setup a career and thats gonna fun. I can't wait for good things to start happening in the future. Let's just hope it starts off with work first lol. Without that you cannot go no where. So I will get all this done and keep on typing everything to prove that this is what I want in life. Watch and see lol.

So Far So Good :)!

Well things are starting to look up and I'm so happy that my friends and families are so happy to hear about how my son is doing very good. He's crawling :) Yay! Well soon here I guess me, Jas and my mom might be moving to another place. I don't know where yet. I hope it's cl;oser to the city. There's so many things out here and I finally met with my mom's friends and they're so cool and chill to be with. I went to three interviews and hopefully these guys don't take that long to hire me lol. I just can't believe other jobs out there make you wait for over two months when you really need help. So anyways I have been looking at books with my mom and reading this book is so helpful. It help you out with weight and how to look forward. I'm still reading it, I just don't have time to buy it lol. Well I've been working out and eating alot better like the way I use to eat in my high school year when I was like under 65lbs lol. I just so happy to hear good new's today and all day. I hope this is like this all the time. I'm still lookng forward and it is helping out alot. I'm so glad that I found friends that I haven't seen in forever and it's a great feeling and I couldn't ask have more form what I've seeing and hearing. I just want everyone to know that I love my son so deeping and I'm glad that everyone is doing just great. I just want to just say bless all ya guys lol.

Just Things 2nd day

Wow this is my 2nd day here in blogger. I woke up done a few cleaning and I know this is weird and all but cleaning helps forget somethings. Which is good when your by your self at home waiting for a phone or someone to message you on the Internet. Today has kind of crazy but I just want to thank my young brother for being there for me today. When you need him he is always there. He is my only brother but really he is like my best friend. So that is one of the people who's helping me out get threw all this crazy life and we have our goals set. They're different from mine but I see that it helps me out. Find that someone in your life, anyone who you know that can help you get by. Anyone can find this. I have friends and they all help me out online. Try the Internet. I never thought it would help me get so far to where I am now. Friends help take the pain away. They're always there when your down. Earlier I said find the things to help you move forward in life and have a reason for it, well I love my son. He is making me move. I do anything to see the cute smile on his face. My goal is to make sure he has everything lol. He is my world and my air when I breathe. Hopefully 2 to 3 years from now I'll have a place for him so he can come fishing, surfing or what ever he wants to do. It's all for him. I really want him to look up to has father. The only way how to do that is to help yourself first in life. Get set up. Look for guides that will help you get out of the bad habits. Open a saving and forget what you put in it until a year after see what you have. May you can buy something that can support in or your friends, family and a love one. Wow I feel so much better writing all this down. I feel like it's working and my life is a new beginning. I really want to workout again and lose all the weight I put on but that's because my ex's was so much of a good cook it made me gain alot lol. So yeah, I wonder what today holds for me? I might workout later tonight and maybe hang out since it's a Sunday and there is nothing to do in the house. So I have my friends laptop and it's he only way how I'm able to have Internet since the computers here don't have strong connections to his place. I'll have to buy something strong to get Internet lol. Well guys I'm moving and you should be finding help. There are people out there that goes nuts when they find out bad things. DON'T do anything crazy that will hurt yourself or other people please, I beg you. Life in time will get better. If I'm handling like this you should try to do the same. It hurts but please look forward, find help and think of your love ones. Thanks for seeing this :).

New Life Ahead

Wow where to begin? This is the very first blog that I've ever made so far. Starting all over again in anything is so hard now and days. For both men and women. Children too. Some people need changes and other don't. The ones that don't are the ones that will be in a world of hurt and the ones that want it will react to save their love ones. Change is hard I know but there is a bright future out there and people just need to accept it. Even when you know your right about something, things will not work out. But I say to everyone please don't give-in. It's hard to fight but please keep looking forward. It'll only help you out. I've been threw this and it hurts. Please get help from a best friend or family. Someone you can trust. I know you will be hurt but I'm not saying it's easy. It's not. I have a little boy to take good care of. He is my number one and the reason why I'm looking forward. I love him. Please guys do it for someone you love. I lost a lot and been there and done that. Look forward please. For your kids or someone special. My story so very big. I've struggled with life since I turned 17 years old. I finished high school early and had to work hard in life and take care of my brother when we had no parents. It was hard learning how to do things young and living on your own. Now I'm 25 years old and I want to help people how to get there lives back by showing you guys out there the way how I'm doing it. There are more to tell but that will be later and it will be nothing but the truth that comes from my mouth. Share with me how you guys are taking things and I'll learn from you as you learn from me. There are goals that I want to set in life and here it is: First thing I want to do is look forward by focusing on leaving the one person you don't want to leave that left you, losing weight, getting a future career, taking care of my child, getting things you need like a house or other that you know you can support yourself in, and finding that one true person in the future that you will be happy with and not make the same mistakes. And there will be more goals. I'm so glad I found this site and I look forward in changing my life and I hope this help who's ever reading this. Thanks.